Sorority House Massacre (1987)

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By no means, am I a fan of sororities. In my opinion, why pay dues to make friends, especially when said dues run upwards of 200 dollars depending on where you go to school and what sorority you rush. Sisterhood ho!

I’ll admit, when I rented this movie, I was not expecting very much. I was in a foul mood after dealing with a particularly vile individual and work was most craptacular. I wanted to view near cartoon gory violence and gratuitous boob shots.

It sort of delivered, but they had to put in a crappy back story, a few dream sequences, and psychobabble. This was, in fact, babble from a sorority sister that was ‘studying’ psychology. Now that I think about it, none of these cute coeds really ever went to class other than walking to one of the academic buildings and saying they were going to be late.

But mushing onward with the story-a young girl witnesses her older brother slaughter their family. She avoids harm by hiding in the basement. Several years and memory blocks later, she ends up in college and joining a sorority. One would think with the sorority membership, she ended up perfectly normal, maybe a little vapid. The wooden performance of Angela O’Neill as heroine, Beth, could indicate as such. But they try to add some depth to this character in the form of nightmares involving blood and set dinner tables. The nightmares recur and seem to get more intense as she and her girlfriends rent an old house for a short vacation.

As fate would have it, said rental house was the site of a murder. One would think that at this point, the girls and their respective fraternity member boyfriends would run and scream like cheerleaders (the pun is not lost here). Since this is a slasher movie, and a bad slasher movie at that, the girls set up a concoction involving streamers, a banner and an old Indian statue for a spirit week of sorts-and go through the closet of their rich friend and try on her clothes. Well, at least the flick did its job in the gratuitous boobage department.

But darn the luck, a crazed killer escapes the nuthouse. And wouldn’t you know, it so happens to be Beth’s older brother looking for Beth as she is the last surviving family member. Somehow, some way, he does manage to track her to the very sorority house where she and her friends are vacationing!

By all standards, this was a pretty bland horror movie, and the attempt at a back story blatantly ripped off Halloween. I get the impression that this is geared toward the kind of viewer that only wants to see nudity and violence, which this movie had-with some semblance of a plot thrown in. I was in a bad mood when I watched it, and crap factor aside, it did hit the spot.

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